Last month I went to a wedding of a friend. Confession time: I normally don't wear make up to these events but that day I did. Why? There were going to be a lot of people there that I hadn't seen in 5 years and I wanted to look good. And I was feeling insecure.
Honestly weddings are still a little tough. I enjoyed the ceremony and was excited for the couple. The reception was tough. Talking with ladies younger than me that were married and answering questions about my own life. It was tough. Answering the do you have a boyfriend question is rough for me. It brought up the pain of longing and reminded me of the place I want filled. I was starting to fill very sorry for myself.
But God didn't let me turn the reception into a pity party. He sent me a lady with the words I needed to hear. She asked me what I had done in the last five years, if I had a boyfriend, and how life was going for me. I told her that God had been very good to me. I was working the same job. No boyfriend on the horizon. Still loving my family and friends.
She looked at me and said, "that is so great Rose. You haven't changed a bit. You are still loving God and living out your faith." She kept talking, but my eyes welled up with tears. Here I was looking at myself through a lense of my singleness and hurt. Here she was looking at me through the lense of what God was still doing in me.
It changed my whole perspective on the evening. Maybe I hadn't found a boyfriend, maybe I hadn't built up an amazing career, maybe I still had a lot of unfulfilled dreams, but that doesn't change the fact that God has never left me. He is still here. He is working. He is still loving me.
In the end that's all that really matters. He is the center of our story. He is the light of the world. He is all that we need. He is the Redeemer of the story.
Is it hard to believe that when I look around and it feels like everyone else is getting married? Yes. Is it hard to remember that He is all I need when I feel that longing for a relationship? Yes. Do any of my feelings change who He is? No!
Ultimately He never changes. He will be my constant One. The Lover of my soul. My Rock and Redeemer. He is all Sufficient. He is all that is good.
Now when I think back to that evening, I thank God. I am so thankful that God never left me to myself, but let me be a testimony to His grace. He crashed my pity party with perspective. For that I am grateful.
Have you ever had God crash a pity party with perspective? I'd like to hear about it. Drop me a comment below.
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