For My Single And Married Friends

Photo credit: Mikayla Holman

One of the things I have noticed on Facebook is a lot of posts aimed at singles that go something like this, (picture of me and my guy) single women wait for a love like this. 

Through the years I have read a lot of these posts and come away feeling more discouraged. I know the people who posted this meant well, but when I read this post I feel like it spotlights my singleness. Their fullness spotlights my emptiness. Their relationship status highlights mine. Their wait being over spotlights my (sometimes hard) wait.

When you write a post or are having a conversation, where does the spotlight fall? Sadly I feel like all too often I read these posts and turn the spotlight toward me and what I wish I had. I choose to look at the waiting and the downsides to singleness. 

But where should I be focusing? Toward myself or toward the all sufficient Christ? When I choose to point the spotlight toward Christ and the gospel a change takes place. As I see more of His worthiness my pain becomes less. As I remember all that He is my purpose become clear. 

No matter what position we are in, whether single or married, we are to honor God in the middle of it. In all that we do, if we aren't trusting God wholly and learning to love our neighbors (even through Facebook) we are failing. If He isn't coming through in every Facebook post, every conversation, every word, then we are not living according to the riches of His goodness. 

So how do we do this? 

To my married/dating friends - let me tell you from the bottom of my heart that I am happy for you. I know that your special someone is the fruit of years of prayer and hard relationship work. I hope that I can be one of the ones that celebrates with you and enjoys seeing what God does in your life. 

When you want to encourage your single friends, the best thing that you can encourage us with is the gospel. Encourage us to look to Christ. Encourage us to live the life that God has called us to live.

To my single friends - I know that it's hard to be single sometimes and there's a lot of things we have to deal with. But what if we started rejoicing with people instead of envying them? What if we started encouraging our married or dating friends? What if we starting living life as if  Christ is enough? What if we proclaimed His goodness in our lives? What if we became the best servers, lovers, and friends that we can?

No matter where you are, start declaring His faithfulness to those around you. Let us see what God does when we start loving each other!