What Is Surrender?

For years I thought I hadn't done it right.

It seemed like almost every woman I knew had a story that went something like this. "I kept chasing and wanting guys. All I wanted was to be married. Then one day I gave up. I surrendered my dreams to God. And then the next week THE GUY came into my life." 

The story varied some, but the key theme was the same. The day after surrender happened, the right guy appeared. I would hear stories and think, I must not have really surrendered that desire because I haven't found the right guy.

There were so many times when I "surrendered" that desire. So many times of thinking that this time I'd really done it. Still no guy appeared.

This led to me thinking that if I wanted it, God wouldn't give that to me. So I would try to figure out how to stop desiring it. Start desiring the right things. My reasoning was is that if God saw that I wanted Him first, that He would give me a guy. 

The problem was I just wanted a guy. It became my obsession. It became my idol. Oh, I would tell you that God was my first desire, but deep down my greatest desire was to have a guy. My actions and life bore witness to that fact. My fists were clinched. My desire firmly in my grasp. 

Then came the night that my parents lovingly confronted me about where my focus was. They pointed out that it wasn't on God, but on my idol of marriage. I was hurt. That night I stayed up late and talked to God. That night I finally surrendered my dream to Him. That night I started to dream of a future where He was the main focus. My hands opened to Him.

Literally 5 days later I was asked out on a date. I was so happy. Oh, how quickly we forget our promises when we think we can meet our desire. I reverted back to my old idol. I grabbed my desire for marriage and held it with a vice grip. Instead of surrendering the relationship to God, I sought to gratify my desires. 

It was at this moment that my All-Wise God did the most loving thing He could, but at the time it felt so hard. He broke my hands. He shattered my grip. In the process of breaking my life broke too. 

But God is so good. Day by day He put me back together. He healed my hands to praise Him. He remade the mangled mess. He breathed new life into me. 

In the process He taught me what surrender looks like. It's not a one time deal that you make with God. It's hands open and turned up toward Him. It's when you see desires, dreams, plans, everything as His not yours. 

Ouch! That's a hard one for me. Even now there are things that I have in my hands that I have to bring before Him. Things that I grab onto that I need to give back to Him. Sometimes it takes work to pry my fingers off. 

But with surrender there is great freedom. It takes the burden of control off of you and transfers it to the only One who can carry it. Now you are free to worship God and love those around you without needing to clinch them. You can dream and plan without fear because you know that He ultimately is in control. You can work diligently and serve faithfully because you know that this job is a gift from God. 

Today what do you have in your fist? Job? Money? Dream? Desire? A Person? 

What would you need to do to take one finger off? I challenge you to do it. Do one thing today that will pry a finger off of that thing. It may not be easy, but it will be a start.

But why should we? What makes it worth it? Being able to lift two free hands to our Beloved and say "All that I am is Yours. Not my will, but Yours be done." It is beautiful music to His ears. 

Stones Fall

There's great freedom in letting go     

There's strength in the middle of surrender

There's beauty in relinquishing rights

When we let go of our need to be right

When we let go of needing to balance the scales

When we let God be God

When we realize how much we have been forgiven

When we see how much grace has been shown to us

When we rest in Gods love

That is when harsh lips become silent

That is when grief turns to hope

That is when healing begins

That is when transformation happens

That is when stones fall from our hands

Take the time today to come before God and let stones fall. 

Lions

Source: upi.com

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but you have a lion in your house. Yes, that's right. You have a ferocious beast in your house. 

If I'm totally honest, I have a lion in my house too. In fact, he is with me wherever I go. 

His name? Sin. This is the nasty destructive lion that follows us around wherever we go. 

But why? Why do we have this lion that follows us? Why don't we get rid of him? For some of us it started years ago. A cute little lion showed up at our doorstep wanting food. We could feed it or the Spirit. We could have the company of the lion or the Spirit, but not both. We chose to feed the lion. 

Over the years the lion has grown in size. Suddenly it's not as easy to feed the lion. It always wants more. He promises satisfaction, but it's fleeting at best. He is always wanting us to up the ante. The fleeting pleasure is sweet. The thought of more is tantalizing. 

So we feed him. We turn to him for pleasure instead of the Spirit. 

We've tried to hide him as best we could, but we are always worried that he is going to come out at the worst moment and expose us. We are always keeping one eye on the hiding place and praying that we can get through another day without the lion coming out.  

We've thought about becoming free from the lion. We daydream about a life where we don't have to fear the lion. a life where I can be free from the lions grasp. A life when I can let people get close. A life where we can live without fear that people will find out about the lion. Yet we don't throw it out. 

The problem is that the lion knows when you are tired and discouraged. It knows when to kill the prey. Slowly and painfully it will destroy you, your close friendships, your ministry, and your witness. It will claw and gnaw at your very life.  

Suddenly that cute little lion that we let in and fed all those years ago has become a monster that we can't control. Worse, it's eating away at everything and everyone we love. 

Such is sin. It is no laughing matter. What may have one appeared cute and harmless is now eating away at your very soul. 

If I ended it here, this would be a bleak picture indeed. But there is one who has killed the lion. There is one who never let in the lion. Not even a little cute lion. He lived among us, but He did not succumb to the sin that we fall prey to. 

On the cross He let all of our lions devour Him.  He stretched out His hands in surrender and let the lions devour Him. In that moment He lost that closeness of fellowship He had always shared with His Father. He felt the full weight of our sin. He died being devoured by the lies that naw at us every day. 

Praise God! This is not the end of the story! Christ conquered the lions. He let them destroy His life, but then He rose again! God brought about the victory over sin forever! 

This is the best news for us who live among the lions. We can conquer! Because He conquered, He invites us to share in His victory! We don't have to live in fear of the lion. We can conquer the lion. With God working in us and strengthening us, we can daily walk in the Spirit and not be the slave of the lion. 

We all have a lion that lives with us, but we can choose who we choose to feed. We can choose who we will walk with. We can choose who we serve. 

Praise God! He gives us freedom to be slaves to Christ!

Asking The Wrong Question

I have been asking the wrong question and I think the answer that I have been giving myself was as wrong as this question. 

The question was: What if I never get married? What then?

On the surface there doesn't seem to be anything wrong with this question. I was encouraged to consider this question a few years ago and have been mulling over it ever since. But I think it is a wrong question. Why?

Recently I was up late thinking. In my half awake state I felt like this question floated to the top of my mind. Then God's thoughts started invading. What if I have been asking the wrong question? What if instead of asking what if I never get married, I asked what if God chooses that for His glory and my best that I remain single?  

It may seem like I'm asking the same question, but I realized a big difference between the two. The difference was who the focus is on. If I am the focus of my story then I will end up sad and disillusioned. But if I chose to make God the center of the story I end up satisfied in Him. 

It's like I'm on a stage. I can choose to run onto center stage and demand that the spotlights focus on me. But promoting myself and my supposed worth leaves me empty and hopeless. What if instead I went out on that stage, but let the light illuminate the True Center of this story? When I highlight His goodness and love and let Him be the center, lives change for His glory. This gives me peace and hope. 

I'm not perfect at this yet. I'm still learning to ask better questions and let God be God in all of my life. He is so patient and loving. He cares for me and loves me more than I will ever know. Living a life that is completely His and that honors Him is what I strive for. Living a life that spotlights Him is a worthy goal. 

Ultimately you and I are not our own. You are not your own. You were bought with a price therefore glorify God with your body. 

Let us strive today offer all of our ourselves as a holy sacrifice to God. For His glory and our greatest good. 

27!

Source:https://www.sophie-world.com/blog/how-plan-golden-birthday-party

God has been so incredibly good. Today I'm celebrating my golden birthday! I'm 27!

I'm so thankful for all that God has done in my life. As I look around me I see so many of the gifts and blessings that God has placed in my life. Here's a list of the top 27.

1. Gods Love and Mercy

2. Forgiveness 

3. Family

4. Friends

5. Church

6. Vacations

7. Hope Family Thrift Store

8. Good Food

9. Fun Clothes

10. The Bible

11. Home

12. Pink and Gold

13. Coffee, Smoothies, Fruit Juice 

14. Workouts

15. Long Walks

16. Christian Music

17. Audiobooks

18. Journals

19. Sticky Notes

20. Texts & Emails From Friends

21. Crafting - Crochet, Cross Stitch, Sewing, Card Making, Needlepoint, and Coloring

22. Inspiring Words

23. Hanging Out With Friends

24. Healing

25. Beautiful And Fun Souvenirs 

26. Flowers Especially Roses

27. Twenty-Seven Years Of Life

Identity #3: Who I Am

When I was beat down and broken, He reminded me of who I am. When I was reeling from loss and didn't know what to do, He wooed me back to Him. When I felt defeated He reminded me of my purpose. The beautiful purpose that He had for me before the foundation of the world was laid. 

When I was in my early teens I wanted to do God's plan for my life. I wanted Him to give me a mission to accomplish. I prayed and asked God what He wanted me to be. 

It was then that He gave me a vision for what He wanted me to be. In a nutshell it's this: I want to be a woman passionately seeking God's heart and I want to encourage the Church. It's that simple. 

Through the years I've tried to follow His leading and encourage the Church. It's looked so different for different times in the last 15 years. Sometimes it's looked like being there for a neighbor when they felt alone. Encouraging a friend that she's on the right track. Blogging. Pursuing a closer walk with God through study and quiet time. Singing to a baby in the Neonatal Intensive Care. Though the expression has been different the vision has been the same.

But recently He showed me how He sees me. He sees me as His bride that He is making ready for Himself. He is cleansing and refining. He has and is giving me white to wear for the day when I meet Him. 

When I was preparing for my wedding, I spent so much time planning the details and worrying about how I would look for that day. What if I started putting as much preparation for my heavenly wedding? What if I prepared for the day when I will walk down a gold paved aisle to meet my God? What if I lived as the blood bought Bride of Christ? 

So who am I really? I am Rose. Chosen by God before the foundation of the world was laid to become His. Through the blood of Christ, I am cleansed and sanctified to be ready for service. Now I can love and encourage the church wherever I find them. 

And one day I will meet my God dressed in the purity that He purchased for me. One day I will see the joy on His face at my coming. One day I will be fully His bride beautiful. 

For now I wait and prepare for that day. For now I trust Him and follow His leading. For now I walk free in Him. I know who I am. I am His. 

Special Thanks to Mikayla for the photos. 

A Prayer

Lord, 

You are so Good and Faithful.

You are Holy and True. 

You are Great and Kind. 

You are the Creator and Redeemer.

You are God above all. 

You are the King of all Kings.

You are the Merciful and Compassionate.

You are beyond my comprehension.

And in all this, You want me for Your own. 

You have given me a calling and purpose. 

You have given me a part in Your story. 

Father, let me be faithful. 

Let me each do what You have given me. 

Let me honor You each day. 

Let my life encourage others to follow You. 

Let me be Your light. 

Amen.