A Dormant Season

      

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I remember the moment like it was yesterday. I was walking outside. The air was chilly. The seasons were changing. I was scared.

It was fall of 2017. The year had been a hard one of my own making. I had cried and been through so much pain. As the cold weather came, I could feel the cold setting into my heart. Somehow I knew that this wasn't just another change in seasons. It was the beginning of a season that I would look a lot like the world around me. The color would be gone and things would be dormant. And I didn't want to be dormant. I wanted to be made whole.

So I cried. "Lord, I don't want to be here. I want to be full of life again. I don't want this season of dormancy."

He was so calm and gentle with me. He came and spoke the encouragement I needed to hear. "This season will come. Yes it will look like you are dormant, but that is not the full picture. This season will be one of deep healing. I am here with you. Embrace it."

I took a deep breath. I knew He was right. In that moment I surrendered myself to Him and embraced the winter. 

The cold came. The trees dropped their leaves. The world went dormant. Yet in that season, God still walked with me. Even in the hidness and dormancy of winter, God worked healing. 

I praise God that dormant seasons aren't forever. Just as winter comes, spring also comes. He leads us through all seasons for His names sake. He heals broken, surrendered hearts for His glory.

Lord, I come to You afresh today. You have me in this time and place for a purpose. This season is of Your making. I pray that I would be surrendered wholly and completely to You. That I may walk through this season in a way that honors You. Amen. 

Dogs At My Heels

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Recently I've taken back up bike riding. I had ridden a bike a lot in my teens, but had gotten out of the habit. Now I enjoy the exercise of a good bike ride around our country neighborhood.

There's only one big fear that I have. It's getting attacked by a dog. The sound of a bark is enough to make me peddle harder and avoid eye contact. Once the barking fades, I slow down and relax.

Yet sometimes I wonder if God does the same thing in my spiritual life. I will be peddling on going nowhere fast. Then all of the sudden I'll hear a dog barking. It comes in different forms. A friends rebuke. A challenging situation. An added stress. An unexpected need. Suddenly I find myself needing to peddle harder. To reach up for God's strength. To pour out more. To pray more. To give more. To live fully alive. 

And when the barking fades I look up to see that I'm farther down the road then I thought. The barking gave me the incentive that I needed to carry me forward. So I thank God for the times He's allowed the barking dogs into my life. For the times God gave me the strength and focus to peddle harder. For the times that I get to look up and see I'm farther down the road than I thought. 

His Strength

I sat down on the floor of the darkened room. The children slept peacefully. I had reached on end. The conversation with God went something like this.

"God I can't do any more. I've poured out everything I have on these friends. I'm working and trying to be there for those that need me. I've been fighting in prayer, texting, calling, and pouring out. Now I have nothing left to give. I'm done."

"Daughter, don't give up. Keep loving."

"Lord, I can't. I told You. I have nothing left in my resources. I'm empty. I know that these friends need more from me. Yet I don't have it in me to give them."

"You can't do this in your own strength. Look to Me. I will provide all that you need." 

As I sat there I found He had filled the emptiness with His love and grace. I knew that I could love those that I had been given to love that day. It wasn't in my own strength and power. It was in His. He had filled me to continue doing what He had called me to do. He had given me the love that I needed to pour out onto others. 

It's just another tangible example to me that the power to live this life doesn't come from me. It comes from Him. He is the Source and Giver of all life. He is gracious and will give me all that I need.

Today if you are feeling stretched thin and like you can't go on, reach out for His limitless strength. He longs to be more than you could ever imagine. 

When My Plans Get Wreaked

I feel like the words in this picture describe most of what I've done throughout 2020. I had made plans. I had things wanted to do and set out on an adventure filled year. 

Then I had to cancel so many plans. All of us have. All of us had to deal with disappointments. All of us wish we could have stuck with the original plan.

But that's not what God had in mind. He had a better plan. He knew we needed this. He knew we needed to grow. He knew that for many of us it would be the wake up call we needed. He knew this would be a time to remember what's really important. He knew this was what we needed not what we wanted. 

Do I like having to cancel plans repeatedly? No. Do I like growth pains? No. Am I thankful that God works even in the middle of crazy times and disappointmented plans? You'd better believe it! I'm so thankful that God is sovereign and that He is at work no matter what the world is throwing at us. He is still good and He is actively working in our lives. As one of my favorite Bible teachers Whitney Capps says it like this, "Life is hard. Hard is good. God is best."

If we could only grasp this beautiful reality, what a difference it would make. We could embrace the challenges and canceled plans with joy because we know that God is working out the very best in us. He is overseeing the master plan. He is sovereign and good. 

I know for me it hasn't been easy to cancel so many plans, but the longer that the uncertainty drags on it makes me more and more grateful that God is working even this for the very best. It's hard. Hard is good. Why? Because in the hard we have the opportunity to reach out for the best. The best is God. The best will always be God. 

And that is why we can have joy. Let's embrace this reality a little more fully today shall we? 

My Running List

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I went to clean up the latest mess and try to contain my frustration. The day was not going well. I mentally added this latest problem to the growing list of things that were going wrong today. I was trying to my best and fight my blah mood, but I felt like nothing was getting me out of the blah. Nothing terrible had happened, just a lot of little things kept going wrong.

I took a deep breath. This was wrong. I was wrong. I shook myself and realized that I had been making the wrong list. 

I sat down. It was time to make another list. I started a list of all the things I was thankful for. A list of the things that are true about God no matter what kind of day I'm having.

By the time I was done my perspective had shifted. My day didn't drastically change. There were still some things that annoyed me, but my heart was better for having made a list of things that I'm grateful for.

No matter what your day throws at you, you have an amazing opportunity to be grateful for what God has given you instead of focusing on the bad. You have the chance to refocus on the good. Is it easy? Sometimes no, but it's always better. Let us always overflow with thankfulness for who He is and all that He has given us. Even on bad days there's so much to thank Him for.

So the next time you're having a rough day and are tempted to start making a list of all the things that are going wrong, stop a minute. Start making a list of all the good things in your life. Remember who God is and what He has rescued you from. Shift your eyes to Him. Your day may not change, but you will.